Another two months have passed since I last posted on my blog. I did a few vids on YouTube that I meant to link and forgot. But I wanted to make a brief post about something great.
I've always been an overly emotional person. Most of my friends know I'm an empath and can not only sense their emotions (often times sensing feelings they aren't even consciously aware of), but I can also very easily change the moods of those around me when I've got my own emotions under control.
My whole life I have had a really hard time dealing with emotions. Both the good and the bad. I'd let one thing going wrong build up in my head until I was in an out of control freak out mode thinking that my whole life was screwed up. On the flip side, if something really awesome would happen I would focus on it and let everything else fall apart and not care. Blowing off all the normal stuff to either only focus on those really great moments or dwell on the really awful ones.
I always viewed life as one long line. A chain of events. A rollercoaster going up and down but always going where I had no control over the ride. But that's not right. Well, not right for me at least.
About a week ago a very close and dear friend, who also lets his emotions get the best of him when things go really bad or really great, explained to me his thought process around this topic. And his coping mechanism. See, life is not one long line you're traveling down. But rather a huge collection of separate dots. Each dot is one moment. And just because that one moment is bad doesn't mean it has to make every moment after it bad. Because they aren't directly connected if you don't let them be. The bad moment will pass. As soon as I feel a bad mood coming, that second when I realize things have happened that are going to upset me I stop and tell myself I'm having a bad moment and it will pass. Then I focus on all those great moments I already have planned in the near future. And suddenly I feel better. I feel ok. The bad moment passes really quickly. And the reality that I've realized from doing this is that there are FAR more good moments than there are bad. Like a hundred times more! But I was always letting that one bad moment escalate and dominate everything else until it made several potentially happy moments suck as well.
On the other hand, when those really good moments happen, don't get sucked in! That's also when I have to tell myself, yes, I'm having a super amazing moment right now, and as much as I would love it to last forever, it's not going to. So I stay in that moment fully and enjoy it as much as I can and revel in that moment while I have it. Knowing that this happy moment will one day be part of the moments I remember when I'm having a bad moment. But when it passes, it's gone. And it's just a matter of accepting that that amazing moment that made you happier than ever before is over, and it will never come again. Other moments equally great or maybe even more so may happen in the future. But that one is gone. And life goes on.
It seems like such a simple concept when you step back and look at it. But it can be difficult to get used to. But having done this for a week successfully I can say that was the least dramatic, most laid back, fun, and just overall chill week EVER! I feel so motivated now about the future. I feel like my last big hurdle (myself) has been dealt with. Sure, there's other stuff, there's other issues to deal with. But overall, I feel really good about life and my future right now. I have many plans for my future in the works right now and have started several new things lately.
"Goddess is good, life is great, and people are crazy." - rephrased a quote from a friend.
Keep an eye on my blog in the near future for an upcoming video I'm doing. I've decided to take my crazy life story and just share all of it in an hour video that I hope to be able to add still photos to as well. I have to teach myself how to do that. It will be for my 40th bday and my 8 months since surgery. And in there I intend to share everything! Like all those good and bad and flat out crazy things I've seen done and been through. I've been so many places, done so much, seen so much. Everyone knows bits and pieces but no one knows everything. Going to put it together and wrap it up and end it. And then begin life anew, at 40, starting a whole new story. :-)